My daughter and I have deep, 7-minute long, conversations while waiting for the bus. Recently, she asked me what my hopes and dreams are. My initial response was “Well, I had those when I was younger, but I don’t have any right now.” Wait a minute! I don’t have hopes and dreams? Why the hell not? Are they only for the young? I set business goals every year and there are always a few personal goals thrown in there for good measure. But those goals are for the upcoming year, and do they qualify as “hopes and dreams”? I don’t think so- they don’t feel lofty enough. Per DifferenceBetween.com “A dream can be a cherished ambition or desire, or an idea created in your imagination. Hope is a feeling of expectation and desire for a particular thing to happen.”

This can’t be just me. Or more correctly, I hope it’s not just me! So, I took a very unscientific (I used to be a scientist, and this is poor, at best, but will serve the purpose) survey. The people surveyed were my middle-aged friends, who I thought might answer me, and not give me side-eye for the next year.

The result was this:

  • About half write down their goals for the year. Many noted that it was a habit, and they have list addictions similar to mine. Just FYI- research has shown that people who write goals down, and share them, tend to be more successful in achieving the goals. Neuroscience explains why.
  • Most had what they considered to be ‘hopes and dreams’ for the future. There was a trend for those with school age kids (like me) to respond with ‘maybe’, or their hopes and dreams were centered around their kids more so than themselves. So maybe it’s not just me after all. One survey participant noted that they “had hopes and dreams but most have been crushed by domestic life”.

Interestingly, many told me that it made them think and they had conversations with someone else about ‘hopes and dreams’ afterwards. So, if you’ve lost sight of your hopes and dreams in the day to day churn, how do you get reconnected with them?

Annual goals are a great place to start. And to be fair, I’ve got some stuff on there that is probably ‘hope and dream’ material, but I really don’t think too far in the future. Jim Collins and Jerry Porras coined the term BHAG (Big Hairy Audacious Goal, pronounced BEE-hag) in their 1994 book entitled Built to Last: Successful Habits of Visionary Companies. “A BHAG is a 10-25 year compelling goal that stretches your company to achieve greatness.” BHAG is really just ‘hopes and dreams’ for a business. So how do you get yourself thinking beyond the short term?

It would appear that the answer lies in prospection. Prospection refers broadly to the mental representation and evaluation of possible futures, including such functions as planning, prediction, and daydreaming. Some easy ways to start thinking about the future are:

  • Pick a point in time, or age, and daydream about what you would like your life to be like. I like to use “wave a magic wand” because we want to eliminate all the head trash (i.e., should, can’t) and potential barriers to achieving what you want. Try thinking about it in terms of lifestyle, relationships, income, location, community, etc. What does your life look like then?
  • Slightly morbid, but write your eulogy. Or better yet, write a tribute speech for your 100th birthday. What would you like the description of your life to be?
  • Use the BHAG approach. What would greatness look like for you?

So, no, ‘hopes and dreams’ are not only for the young. We get caught up in the daily grind. No one is encouraging us to define them like they did when we were young. Dreams get crushed by reality or by what we think we can do or should do. Here’s your challenge (and to myself), pick a dream, at least one, small or large, personal or professional, that matters to you and make the commitment to achieve it by a specific date. Write it down, tell someone about it, and figure out what it takes to ‘wave the magic wand’.